September 29, 2007

HEY, JOE
by Ted Lerner

CHANGING REALITY IN X-TREME HD

When I was a kid, Iraq was a lightly tan colored spot on the classroom globe. It was a color that represented arid desert and was indecipherable from similarly colored places nearby on the rotating sphere, such as Iran. In my young school kid's mind the two countries were just alike; strange, far away lands, with the only difference being one letter on the end.

As a kid I never knew an Iraqi person. Not that I didn't want to meet an Iraqi if given the chance. My parents traveled the world and always urged my brothers and I to be open minded, to treat all people with respect. It's just that I never had the opportunity to meet an Iraqi. So I guess I never cared either way.

I think of those innocent memories now because I, as an American, am being constantly reminded how so vitally important Iraq is to us. I hear our leader and his minions making daily proclamations about how we are going to stay the course there, until every last �terrorist' is routed and American-style democracy is firmly entrenched in the Middle East. Then, he says, we will leave. What he doesn't say, however, is that we're quietly building 14 permanent military bases, along with the largest embassy in the history of the world, in Iraq. Which means that this is now our reality as Americans; Iraq will be an American dominated fiefdom for the next generation, at least.

As this new American reality unfolds, I see my countrymen getting blown up and maimed on a daily basis, and I see my people doing this to Iraqis in their own land. Everyday, as the violence flares anew, we are reminded that it is a noble cause that's worth fighting for. But as the violence begets more violence, I often wonder, as have an increasing number others, why we don't simply alter this reality, by just packing up and leaving Iraq.

Oh no, we're told; if we leave Iraq it will descend into chaos. Well isn't it already mostly in chaos? Why can't we let Iraqi's sort out their own affairs? Aren't people everywhere happier when they sort out things for themselves, rather than at gunpoint from outsiders? And, after the blatant lies which have been told in order to take us into this quagmire, why exactly should I be forced to care?

It seems patently obvious. America is a heavily armed occupying army camped in a country that never asked us to come and help. Our very presence in Iraq under these circumstances was, is and always will be a lightning rod, a rallying point for those who simply don't want a foreign occupying force meddling in their affairs. Aren't we, as a nation blessed with more institutions of higher learning than any culture in the recorded history of Man, smart enough to realize that other people in other countries can't be expected to understand our noble causes? After all, they were raised within a different culture, with a different language, history and educational system. In other words, they have a completely different reality.

It's not only human nature; it's common polite etiquette. Any intrusion by outsiders will be seen as interfering and meddling. Imagine if at the height of the Cold War, the Soviets had invaded America, deposed our government, dissolved our military, imprisoned and killed your relatives and decided to hang around for fifty or so years in order to ensure their vision wins out. Overnight we would have become, in the eyes of our occupier, a nation of insurgents, guerillas and terrorists. We'd call ourselves Freedom Fighters.

Clearly any institution created in Iraq while Americans are there running the show will be seen as compromised and tainted. Especially in this age of warp speed communication for the masses, where literally everyone's reality--from the Duke of York to an Afghan warlord, from the Sultan of Brunei to the beggars of Mumbai-- all of it has become completely subjective, AND broadcast live, in color and downloadable in MP3 quality on your X-treme High Definition hand-held device. Thus, anyone with a cause can simply twist the circumstances to whatever message they want to impart.

Now, I certainly don't believe in cowering back into a protective bubble and not engaging with the world. It's just that guns and bombs clearly don't get it done anymore, no matter how precision-like their makers claim them to be. There must be a better way of making sure our ideas and ideals are taken to heart, rather than repudiated and shoved back in our face. There must be a way to engage the world. There must be a way for us to radically alter our current reality that is the debacle in Iraq, and an ever increasing number of enemies around the globe. And it must offer a win-win situation for all.

If this sounds sneakily like something akin to the goals of sales training, well, you're right. Sales is what America is good at, and I'd rather win the fight of ideas with sales. And a basic tenet of good sales mean both sides walk away happy. Which brings us to outer space.

Hundreds of millions of dollars are poured into the space program each year. Sure there are benefits, especially those discoveries we use here on Earth. But now we're told we need to go to Mars. For what? So we can discover that once upon a time, there was life on our barren, bald red neighbor.

I've not yet figured out how that mind numbing discovery will help my family and I, or generations down the line. Actually most reasonably educated folks are already quite certain that, at some point hundreds of billions of years ago, our species inhabited Mars, ruined it like we're ruining our planet now, and then got up and left for greener pastures, namely Earth.

Think of the trillions in treasure which will literally be sent into outer space and up towards Mars. Now, what if we were to decide to keep that money right here on earth, and use it in a way that would radically change our gravity based reality? Certainly a good and intelligent way to start would be to do something that will ensure we no longer be required to send our military forces to far away lands to embark on crusades which the locals don't understand, killing and maiming thousands on all sides along the way, while pissing away money like it was water.

Therefore, in order to alter the current actuality, America needs a new national purpose, a goal put forth by the national leadership along the magnitude set by President John F. Kennedy on May 25, 1961, when he announced America would put a man on the moon within the decade. This new national purpose?

We're getting out of oil in 25 years.

That's right, we're not just cutting down our consumption, we're quitting. We're going to tell the world, and especially the Saudis, the Iraqis, the Venezuelans, the Russians and everyone else whom we buy oil from that, �We're so sorry, but we aren't going to be needing that dark fluid beneath your lands anymore. Not that we don't care about you or your people. It's just that we've decided to go another way, and we're not buying what you're selling�

Sure there'll be heaps of propaganda about how it's a mere pipe dream, that it will take centuries to wean ourselves off of our dependence on fossil fuels. Then you'll hear lots about how alternatives are good, but they're too expensive or not reliable. And, of course, they'll say, there's no good distribution system in place to feed our ever-growing needs. This, as could be expected, is all greasy, black, liquid nonsense, spewed forth by those making record profits off of the high cost of oil.

Because we're not constricted by ancient culture, however, America is good at setting impossible goals. Combined with our supposed love of free thinking, this means our strength is being good with ideas. If we took all those brilliant minds which sit around all day trying to figure out how they can develop a trillion ton nuclear bunker buster, or a Cruise missile which can be controlled by a Game Boy joystick from half-a-world away, we can easily come up with an alternative to oil. We can make sure it's affordable. And it can be done in 25 years. Oh, and as an extra added little bonus, we could, as direct result of this radically forward thinking, probably reverse global warming during that same generation and save the entire planet from destruction.

Before 1961 the phrase, �that's like going to the moon,� was a common way for people to describe something that was simply impossible. Only when our national leader set a goal of doing the impossible, did going to the moon become something that was suddenly possible. And then, of course, it became reality. Since then, nobody could ever use that phrase to tell you that you can't do something.

If America sets the �impossible� goal of getting off oil in 25 years, oil producing countries will absolutely freak out. But what can they do? Send suicide bombers to sabotage our backyard phytoplankton bio diesel factories? But at that point why would the average Iraqi care about an American, if we weren't in their country with guns in their faces telling them how things should be done?

And then our new reality would be that we might actually be welcome there, and in other lands where they currently hate us. We might even find that we are suddenly winning people over to our way of thinking, and to our lofty ideals, just like in good sales. Indeed wouldn't it be much better to be able to engage the world as a common salesman, or even as a tourist?

Anything but as an armed, paranoid outsider on a so-called noble mission.

Email Ted at ted@hey-joe.net